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Are you a school counselor who is treating a client that has been cyber bullied or are you a parent that has a child that is being cyber bullied or perhaps you yourself are a student who is a victim of cyber bullying? What do you think is the cardinal rule that most victims should not violate?
Should you Retaliate?
The key principle is to not follow through with your normal reaction of retaliating against the bully. So what can your client, child or you yourself do if you are being bullied.
Actions to Take Against a Cyber Bully
- Is to ask yourself what evidence do I have that cyber bullying has occurred? Then to create a folder and paste into word format e-mails, internet posts, and social media posts etc. An easy way to do this is to create a screenshot of the web page and then report the bully to a trusted adult such as a parent, member of your family, teacher, or a counselor at your school.If you fear retaliation by the cyber bully, and do not report them their attacks may become more aggressive
- Are you receiving harmful threats and inappropriate sexually focused messages? These need to be reported to the police. The cyber bullies actions can be prosecuted in a court of law
- As you may be aware, cyber bullying can be relentless unfortunately cyber bullying usually includes several incidences. Are you experiencing attacks over a period of time? Just as the cyber bully may be relentless you also may need to be relentless. What do I mean by being relentless? You may need to keep recording all of the times that the bully has said a cyberbullying message to you. You do not need to feel that you just need to bear it.
- How do you stop cyber bullying through communication? Here are three examples. First of all and this is pretty easy is to block their e-mail address. Secondly block their phone number from your cell phone and thirdly delete the cyber bully as a social media contact. You can then contact your internet service provider (ISP)
Points to Remember When You are Being Cyberbullied
- Don’t be involved in the blame game regarding yourself. Remember cyber bullying is the fault of the cyber bully and not yours. Regardless of how to e-mail or blog post reads there is no reason to feel shame regarding how you feel. It is important to remember that the cyber bully is the problem and you are not.
- Gain a different perspective. Think of this cyber bully as a very sad perhaps self-angry individual. He or she is trying to gain power over you and your feelings. The reason is they want you to feel self-hate about yourself that he or she feels about his or herself. You cannot provide them with this satisfaction by taking the steps listed
- Do not go into your own self-hate mode. In other words beating yourself up. If you have experienced cyber bullying what increases the problem is continuing to think about it and perhaps reading and re-reading the e-mails or blog posts. If you have decided to save the cyber bullying messages for evidence, put it away in a remote folder and delete it from your timeline so you are not repeatedly reviewing the attack. Then think of the many wonderful things about yourself and accomplishments that you like and admire.