However, my client Andrew found a way to observe his daughter Lacy’s behavior when he drove Lacy and her friends home from soccer practice.  Andrew stated, “I heard Lacy plotting with her friends to tease another girl in the class.  When I told Lacy later that I disapproved of her behavior, she just laughed and said that the girl was annoying and deserved to be teased.  I was horrified!”

Step Two: Watching
A second step is for parents to watch how their child treats his or her siblings. I explain to parents that if their son or daughter teases or bullies his or her younger siblings, chances are he or she acts the same way in the classroom.  My client Max had two boys, Larry, age 12, and Simon, age 8.  Max stated, “I never picked up on it before, but the other day I noticed Larry demanding Simon lend him his CD player.  When Simon said no, Larry started to push him around.”

Step Three: Talking to Teachers
In addition to listening when the student talks about his or her friends, and observing how the student treats siblings, a third step is for parents to talk to the student’s teacher, and to other parents. Clearly, teachers are good sources of information about a child’s social interactions.  Additionally, other parents may have information about children who may be involved in bullying.

Step Four: Monitoring the Media
A fourth step is for parents to monitor their child’s media diet.  I ask parents to notice if their son or daughter is hooked on violent video games or movies.  Could they be bringing the modeled confrontational attitudes to school.  Or, does their son or daughter spend leisure time watching shows in which characters frequently ‘dis’ each other?  Does she or he seem to admire these characters?  I encourage parents who answer yes to these questions to take an opportunity to make it clear to their child how they feel about the matter.

For 5th, 6th and 7th Steps for Assessing Bullying go to Risk Management Course

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#1  Assess Pathological Practices
The first area of assessment is to asses pathological practices. To do so, simply assess the precise nature of the destructive self-critical practices that the client is employing. Do so in such a way that, not only can you learn their nature, but the client becomes acutely aware of what he or she is doing.  In addition to standard interviewing techniques, having the client slef monitor, interviewing him or her in the role of the self critic, and logically reconstructing the nature of self critical acts from their effects all represent effective ways to obtain this information.

#2  Assess Ownership of Self Critical Behaviors
The second area of assessment is to assess ownership of self critical behavior.  This can be done by assessing the degree to which clients fully recognize that they are the perpetrators of self critical actions.  Do they recognize this or do they experience the behavior as somehow inflicted on them by sources that seem beyond their control?

For example, a client may make the statement that his or critic won’t leave them alone.  To change, would you agree that clients must ultimately assume as position of recognized personal authorship and control over self critical actions.

For #3,  #4 and #5 Area of Assessment go to Self-Esteem Courses.

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