#1 Preoccupation
The first stage of the addictive experience is preoccupation.  Pedophiles become hostages of their own obsession.  Do you agree?  Their obsessions about child pornography or other sexual acts which involve children become intrusive on their daily activities.  Jim, age 34, stated, “I couldn’t get these images out of my head.  They invaded my life.  I would start work, but then, all of a sudden, I would get flashes of my nephew in my mind, doing things I wish I hadn’t thought of.  Personally, I’ve never enacted them out with him, but I will go to websites and try to instant message kids, just so I can flirt with the ideas.”

I stated to Jim, “Because of your obsession, every introduction and meeting passes through your sexually obsessive filter.  Normally, these obsessions begin to interfere with daily life, and other areas are affected.  Does that ever happen with you?”  Jim stated, “Yeah, I couldn’t concentrate on work, all I could think about were these images and how to make them come about.  I can’t sleep, so I spend most of my time on the internet.  Sometimes, when I’m chatting with people I know are adults, I’ll fantasize that they’re really young teens.”

Clients like Jim are addicted to sexual behavior, and, in the case of pedophiles, become addicted and preoccupied with the thought of sexual acts with children.  I stated to Jim, “I’d like you to think of this preoccupation as a warning sign that’s telling you to watch your steps.  When you begin to feel the obsession taking over, be mindful of it and of your behaviors.”  Think of your Jim.  Is he experiencing this sexual preoccupation?  How would you address his preoccupation?

For #2, 3 and 4 Stages of a Pedophilic Addictive Experience go to Internet Course

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